“Allah” means God. You should know that otherwise this won’t be funny
Posted on July 28, 2009
Filed Under Daily | 15 Comments
Last summer, my “Sheikh,” or religion teacher, needed someone to watch his two youngest kids (who were 4 and 2 at the time) during the day for about a week while the family babysitter was in Syria on vacation. I decided to volunteer myself since I figured playing with his kids for five hours would totally repay him for teaching me how to avoid an eternity in hell.
I’m just giving like that.
I got to my Sheikh’s place around 7 a.m., and his wife gave me a quick run down of the day, and introduced me to the kids before she set off for work. I got the kids breakfast, and while the baby ran around and played, I sat at the table with the ADORABLE 4-year-old boy, and had the following conversation.
Me: How’s your cereal?
Ry: It’s good.
Me: So, do you always use a straw to drink the milk from your bowl while you eat the cereal with a spoon?
Ry: Yes. I always do it.
Ry: Oh No! Did my parents got dead?
Me: WHAT? No! They’re at work.
Ry: It’s okay, Allah did it.
Me: What? No, no He didn’t. Your parents aren’t…
Ry: You know how to make a Pop-Tart?
Me: What?
Ry: Pop-Tarts. You know how to make them?
Me: Well, I guess their made by all the workers at the Kellogg’s factory, and…
Ry: Allah makes them.
Me: What? He does not make Pop-Tarts.
Ry: You know Billy?
Me: Who’s Billy?
Ry: The one who eats his biggers.
Me: What’s a bigger?
Ry: You know, when you pick your nose and…
Me: EW! That’s gross, and besides, they’re called boogers.
Ry: Yeah, that. Billy does that. He’s on T.V. Do you know how he got there?
Me: Where?
Ry: On the T.V.
Me: Well, if Billy is in a cartoon, then he’s probably animated, which means that people in a studio drew…
Ry: Allah put him there.
Me: How’s your cereal?
Ry: It’s good, because Allah made it yummy.
Moral of the story: If you babysit a reglious clergyman’s children, don’t try to explain things. They already have life all figured out.
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On Newlyweds-Dish: How are you making a change in your community?
“Man in the early times was almost naked, and as his intellect evolved he started wearing clothes. What I am today and what I’m wearing represents the highest level of thought and civilization that man has achieved, and is not regressive. It’s the removal of clothes again that is regressive back to ancient times” - Nobel laureate, Tawakul Karman, in response to journalists who said her hijab was not proportionate with her level of intellect and education.
Want to know the truth about Shari'ah and how this Islamic law effects the U.S. Constitution? Watch the videos below.
On Newlyweds-Dish: How are you making a change in your community?
“Man in the early times was almost naked, and as his intellect evolved he started wearing clothes. What I am today and what I’m wearing represents the highest level of thought and civilization that man has achieved, and is not regressive. It’s the removal of clothes again that is regressive back to ancient times” - Nobel laureate, Tawakul Karman, in response to journalists who said her hijab was not proportionate with her level of intellect and education.
Want to know the truth about Shari'ah and how this Islamic law effects the U.S. Constitution? Watch the videos below.
“Man in the early times was almost naked, and as his intellect evolved he started wearing clothes. What I am today and what I’m wearing represents the highest level of thought and civilization that man has achieved, and is not regressive. It’s the removal of clothes again that is regressive back to ancient times” - Nobel laureate, Tawakul Karman, in response to journalists who said her hijab was not proportionate with her level of intellect and education.
Want to know the truth about Shari'ah and how this Islamic law effects the U.S. Constitution? Watch the videos below.
Want to know the truth about Shari'ah and how this Islamic law effects the U.S. Constitution? Watch the videos below.
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omg that was HALARIOUS! i’m going to totally have this conversation with someone random and see what happens. SWEET
hahahahah..
when i was in kindergarden, i didn’t have anything for show and tell… so i told the class and my teacher that my dad died. a phone call to my mother and some days without playtime later… haha
Lol that was too funny, thats too cute…
Awww! That’s so cute!
That was the greatest story ever!
That is hilarious!!!
I remember having a similar conversation with my siblings and the final answer to “Which came first, the chicken or the egg?”
“Allah made them both!” Ahh yes, fool proof answer
And I know Billy! From The Misadventures of Billy and Mandy!
wait no it’s the Grimm Adventures of Billy and Mandy, but well, you get it
The best part is, you can’t really argue with him coz that might make him doubt his dad! You should have said something to your Sheikh…
LOL!
that was cute in a weirdly weird way.
This is..sort of weird.
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHHA.
I cant stop laughing…HAHAHHAHAHHA
LOL!
i bought a bedtime story book from goodwordbooks recently for my 2y.o. daughter. after reading the first 2 pages, i can sort of figure out what’s the last sentence of each page..yeah..Allah made them all!!
(Yay!!). I can totally make my own story to tell my kiddo after that, haha.
Btw, u r funny. i like ur blog
“biggers” got me soooo bad.
HAHAHAHAHAH…i love kids, they know EVERYTHING.
this is so funny and sweet!
Today my daughter ,she is also 4, were playing with her best friend,as she sneezed ,her bf said ;bless u . My daughter corrected ;”Alahmdulila”,I say that!!! You say bless u , cos we are different ,I celebrate EId and you celebrate Xmas ,and guess what who loves me so much in the whole world ….Allah!
(she talks so fast) . It’s cute this “matter of fact” kinda , 4 yrs old, behavior. I’m no Shiekh but I’m a teacher n she asks alot of questions ……awesome post Sabz.